On Friday, October 25, Barb Shelly of the Kansas City Star wrote a column titled “Missouri is still a battleground state – for wacky campaigns.”
For Shelly, what is happening politically in Missouri is a “kerfuffle.” I love obscure words I have to look up. It means exactly what it sounds like, a noisy and disordered commotion. For proofs, she refers to the statewide races of David Spence for Governor and Todd Akin for Senate, as well as supporters of both.
After her opening hook, Shelly began her little tirade with, “We [Missouri] are the only state to have a U.S. Senate candidate disowned by much of his own party,” of course speaking of Akin’s case of foot in mouth.
If fact, the two sentences concerning Akin amounted to 39 words in her 680-word column, or six-percent, spending most of her time writing about David Spence.
As with many of my own columns, Shelly gets her share of detractors, and true to course, she received a less than devastating blow from a reader who evidently did not read the entire column. Mr. Jerry Schleicher, cowboy poet from Kansas City, wrote,
So, Shelly, how many times can you use the words “legitimate rape” in a single sentence? For cripes’ sake, can’t you find another topic to write about? The Star desperately wants single-party politics in Missouri. When Romney, Spence and the rest of the Republican candidates sweep Missouri, we’ll see how you like it.
The KC Star asks that responders “be nice” in their responses. I really tried… I could not help myself:
It is obvious that you do not truly understand the problem with the GOP (most likely your preferred party) and its members supporting century old attitudes concerning women… and other Americans who may not share your vision of a one party democracy that ignores humanity in general and the law of the land.
I praise and am delighted with Ms. Shelly’s remarks, and have echoed the same in my own column in the Columbia Missourian.
To paraphrase Winston Churchill: We shall fight in Missouri, We shall fight on the lakes and rivers, We shall fight with growing confidence, We shall fight on the farms and ranches, We shall fight on in the cities, We shall fight in the streets, We shall fight in the Ozarks; We shall never surrender American democracy, our secular Constitution, or the right call a spade a spade or a fool a fool, especially when someone like Mr. Akin is so – I am trying to remain nice here – irreverent to his fellow citizens.
I just love Churchill, don’t you? Easy to paraphrase and ahead of his time.
Now if only Mr. Schleicher and the GOP candidates become uncomfortable with criticism of their 19th century beliefs, they could finally enter the 21th century and learn that political candidates who suffer from chronic foot-in-mouth disease need to be quarantined for a long, long time.
One more thing, Shelly used “legitimate rape” once in a sentence… Just saying.